What is it about love & relationships that make us go crazy? And what is it that makes us push it away? We're driven by loads of things... fear, love, desire, lack of connection. But, if not taken care of properly, it's easy to distort what love in its purest form is and what kind of "love" you accept. I know from experience what it's like to think you're in love and I also know what it's like to love somebody. Note the difference between what I just said and you'll realize I've never actually fallen in love. I've simply just learned what it means to love somebody. But, I still haven't quite mastered letting somebody love me back just yet. Which leads me to the title, "Love & Other Drugs". At first glance, you think, isn't that just some movie with the ever-so-handsome Jake Gyllenhaal in it? While you'd still be correct... I named this post that to represent the hang-ups from our past that can come when love enters our lives. These "hang-ups" are like drugs to us that are hard to quit, deeply ingrained into the very fibers of our beings. Maybe somebody hurt you? Maybe you hurt somebody? Or maybe you've never been properly loved before so you went out seeking and settling for other forms of "love" because you don't feel that you deserve more. Of course these are the webs we love to tangle ourselves in. My question is, why do we do that? If you're like me.. all you do is crave love. I'd be a liar if I said I didn't think about love everyday of my life. I stand up and then I stumble over my own two feet, labeling myself as independent when really I'm just very fragile in need of support. I'm guilty of letting the wrong guys have my attention and then not being strong enough to tell the guys that should have my attention how I really feel. I'm guarded and I am just ever so particular about who I let in my circle and how close I let them get. This is a problem. I'm tired of being addicted to the drug that is loneliness, lies, and low self-esteem. I'm tired of accepting less than desirable forms of "love." I'm tired of seeing my friends allow themselves to consequently waste their time with boys instead of men. We all deserve more, ... better. I want to know, how is it that we can cheapen love? I don't care whether you are a girl or a guy, infidelity is not gender specific. I wan't to know what is it about love that terrifies us, stops us in our tracks. It's like once things get real, we realize we actually have to make a choice to do better and change. We're scared. Fear, yet another drug. So what do we do to stop it? The hook-ups, the love's lost, the cheating. For me, it starts with my relationship with God. Romans 12:9-13 says "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." However, while faith may not be everyone's first stop. There are loads of things that we can do to help solve this problem. To name a few, we can start by knowing our self-worth and respecting ourselves. And next up, is being intentional about our relationships. Love is hard though. It's a choice and it can take years before we learn how to love ourselves and others. But, that's the cool thing about love.. it's patient, it's kind, and it's infectious! Once we let it in, it festers and keeps growing. Only when we let love grow, can we grow ourselves. Let love make you feel like a Hunter Hayes song. I'm totally with him when he says "I don't want easy, I want crazy!" I suppose in a round-about way, I'm saying we need to look forward to more than just creating our own collection of albums that looks as though they easily could've been penned by Taylor Swift herself. Love drives us crazy because we need it, it's how we were created and as of lately it's what the world needs a lot of. Please know that you're worthy or being loved and you don't have to settle anymore. Don't be discouraged just because odds aren't in your favor right now, for all you know, things could actually be falling into place! I don't know about you, but this year is my year to let go and start learning how to let love in. So what are still doing here reading this blog, go out and get your dream! xx Lisa
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Dear No One,
I just wanted to write you a quick, little note telling you that I think about you all the time. I think about our future together; our future house, our future kids, our future pets and all of the fun memories we will make. I wanted to tell you that I pray for you all of the time too, that the Lord will keep you and strengthen you until that glorious day when He allows for our paths to cross. But until then, I figured there's a few things about me that you should know that I thank you in advance for loving me for anyways: I am such an over-thinker ... I tend to get very anxious and sometimes need a little reassurance that everything is going to be okay. I'm obsessed with the color cranberry, perfume, cologne and all things pertaining to puns and high socks. I like to think I am a funny person, and I promise to always try to keep you laughing until we are old and in wheelchairs. Although, you'll probably come to find out that you're really just dating a corny goofball who likes to laugh at her own jokes within the first 4 months of dating. I'm a bit spastic, bursting with energy ... if things don't keep my interest, I'm already onto the next big thing. So that's bound to keep things spontaneous and interesting. I would be a liar to say that I'm one to shy away from attention, so please just know that your effort, time, and attention you put back into me will never go unnoticed or under appreciated. I love to cook! So, I look forward to Iron Chef America challenges in our kitchen nightly. Having a big breakfast & going to Church on Sunday's with the kids is something I really look forward to. I'm a bit indecisive .. okay, I'm a lot indecisive, so I'm going to ask your opinion on just about everything! (Seriously, I'm so, so sorry about that.. but, I think you'll come to find it, um, endearing .. I'm sure.) I'll probably ask to rescue a dog from the shelter like every week. So there's that. Consequently, a puppy is probably my alter ego, so naturally I love to be all cuddly and affectionate. Nature walks are my favorite and lucky for you I'm always looking for a buddy to go on them with! I hope you have seen every episode of Parks and Recreation by the time we meet because I will quote that show way, way more than I would like to admit. Oh, which brings me to the point that I'm also in a very seriously committed relationship with my best friend who is basically the Ann Perkins to my Leslie Knope; so I hope you don't mind that we're a bit of a package deal. You will probably always be missing at least 3 items of clothing from your closest due to my stealing them to wear for myself. I'm very quick-witted, sassy, and sarcastic ... so I hope you understand my humor and know that I would never ever say anything to purposely hurt anybody! I promise to always try my best to be the best wife to you and mother to our kids. I am literally always dancing and always singing. So, I apologize in advance if we are in public. I will never stop trying to make you feel wanted and needed. I promise to always remind you of how good looking you are and how thankful I am to have you in my life. Be on the look out for small little notes here and there as well telling you just that. I never want to stop going out on dates. Whether it be a night out on the town or a quiet night alone in, I want our kids to see what it really means to be in love with someone. I tend to be very observant.. so I'll probably ask you if anything is wrong often at the first sign of me feeling as though something is off. Communication is very important to me. So please, never hesitate to let me know if there's a problem that I'm not picking up on. When we fight, it's essential to me that we never go to bed angry. Photos. Photos. Photos. and many, many more photos where that came from. I love to capture all of the small moments in life, so I'm sorry for the candids in advance! Last but not least, I want you to know that you're already my absolute best friend. You're my favorite hello and hardest goodbye. You'll be there through every up and every down. You're everything I could've asked for and more. You're my best friend, my life, my love, and most importantly my (future) husband. And even more so, you accept me as I am and love me all the more for that. I can't wait to get to know you more everyday. So here's to the rest of forever, consider this your first note...(feel special) Sincerely, Lisa (your future wife) |
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July 2016
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